Friendships

Have you ever had a friend that you had to stop being friends with? I have. She was my best friend in high school. I always felt right at home with her family and they took me in like I was one of their own. Her mom was the first mom that I knew of that cooked dinner every night and they sat down together every night. We had a falling out during our Senior year of high school because, well, frankly, she turned a little sketchy. She quit answering my phone calls or calling me, just out of the blue. We continued to hang out during school and during group outings, but as for a one on one friendship, it wasn't happening. So, finally, I started to feel like I pushing my friendship on her and I stopped. I think she was mad about it, but I didn't care. I was through being friends with someone who, I felt like, didn't want to be friends with me. So, I went off the the University of Alabama and she went off to Auburn( see? this is probably why this friendship was doomed). She turned sketchy on my other best friend who was her roommate. She eventually moved out of the dorm.
I stayed friends with her sister. Once we came back home, her sister informed me that she wanted to be hang out. She didn't have any friends at home anymore( probably because she alienated them). So, I gave it a try. We never talked about what went down between us, but we were friends again. John never liked the friendship from the start. I think he thought she was too sketchy( which she was).
I love my friendship with her though. We laughed and always had a good time together.It wasn't the same friendship like in high school. In high school, we had numerous secrets and inside jokes and spoke in code. She was still a little distant in our new friendship, but it was fine with me, because I had a boyfriend, who I spent most of my time with anyway.
She was a bridesmaid in my wedding. But during that time, she started the old ways again. She never showed up to any wedding showers or parties that she didn't help throw and I had to get messages to and from her sister. She did come see me in the hospital when I had Addison( which, I didn't even know that she knew that I had her). I threw her a shower when she got married. I went to see her baby after she had her. But, I was once again, forcing my friendship on her. I knew she needed a mommy friend and I thought it was me. I let her borrow some maternity clothes ( which I never saw again). I tried and tried and tried to be a good friend to her. But I was the only one trying.
We ended up severing all ties this past fall. We shared some(I thought) playful words over the Iron Bowl. She turned ugly with it and I thought, "I'm done". I didn't need that kind of negativity in my life. I have enough drama already.
I'm still friends with her through Facebook and I drive by her parents house every day on my way to work and I always wonder what's going on in that house. Sometimes her car is there, but mostly not. I wonder if there will ever be a time when I don't look in that driveway. I do "Facebook stalk" her and she is pregnant with her second child.

John never understood why I waited so long to quit trying to be her friend. It was really hard for me to just stop caring about someone who was a big part of my life growing up. Essentially, it's divorcing a friend. Who wants to do that? Maybe Philly was right all along. Maybe our friendship never would have worked for one reason only. Maybe she was sketchy was because of that same reason.
That reason you might ask? Because she was an Auburn fan.